"I was on a raft and the wind was blowing.. "

Reigning Miss Caliornia Carrie Prejean claims that she did not willingly pose for the topless photos just released by TMZ.com this morning. She states that she was standing on a cliff and the wind was blowing so her breasts were accidentally exposed. I believe her. Carrie and I have a lot in common because something similar happened when I first started modeling. Years ago a photographer hired me to pose in a bikini for a print ad. He requested that I not wear a top because I could conceal my breasts against the plastic raft in which I was floating. I naively agreed to do this because he promised not to snap any photos if my nipples inadvertantly became visible. Suffice it to say that he did not keep his word. The photos above capture the sequence of events that lead to my downfall. When my raft began to capsize the cameraman evidently took numerous topless shots of me as I fell into the water. I did not realize this so I merely climbed back onto the raft and continued posing. After the shoot ended one of the crew members informed me of the photographer's betrayal. I was scandalized! In the last few photos you can first see the consternation in my face and then read the dejectedness in my posture as I slink away into the wilderness.

Ultimately the photographer published a series of topless photos of me. People did not understand what had really happened. They even assumed that the photos with my ass in the air were intended to be sexually provocative. Nothing could have been further from the truth. It was all an accident. Yet I knew that I could never prove it - my reputation was ruined. Consequently I decided to start performing in hardcore pornographic films since my life was already shattered.

Hehehe... just kidding. Nonetheless, I heard Miss California's explanation for her topless photos this morning and I could not help but chuckle. One can only hope that she will eventually see the light and go the direction of former Miss USA Kelli McCarty.


XO Tanya




***

Miss USA Kelli McCarty

I have long had a guilty pleasure that I have kept secret. No, it's not sportsbetting, past drug use, or heavy drinking. I've always spoken very openly about all that stuff. Yet there's something I've kept in the closet all these years - something deeper, darker, and stupider than any of my other current and former guilty pleasures...

I love beauty pageants!!

Oh, yes.. the beribboned beauties, the excitement, the swimsuits, the thrill of victory, the agony of defeat hidden behind a frozen smile, the redoubtable judges, the cheesy hosts, the talent competition, the former beauty queens in attendance, the tense audience members, the scholarships, the protesters, the hypocrisy - I love it all! The sheer, unadulterated foolishness of the whole pageant spectacle has captivated me since I was a little kid. It never gets old. Hot chicks strut around in bathing suits and pretend that they only want scholarships. Why can't they just admit that they want attention, exposure, and the opportunity to flaunt the fact that they are sexy babes? Would it be so wrong to tell the truth?

Imagine my excitement in discovering that one former Miss USA has decided to drop all the pretense. Kelli McCarty has made a hardcore pornographic video. Yes! I love it when members of beauty pageant royalty fall from grace, when they discard the whole charade of being chaste virgins who only aspire to attend college and do charitable work.

Click here to see Ms. McCarty in XXX action!


XO Tanya




***